Hello, again
It’s been over 6 months since my last post and holy moly a lot has changed since then (hello, motherhood). I’ve been wanting to get back into writing in this little corner of mine but honestly struggled with the whole perfection and procrastination thing. I don’t really know where to start or, honestly, if it’s even worth my time. But I have had such an itching for a creative outlet recently, somewhere to document moments and musings, organize my latest discoveries and share with whomever may be reading (even if it’s just one person). I have a very busy mind and while I find journaling extremely helpful, blogging is so much more satisfying and fulfills those creative urges. While a very inconsistent “blogger” (and I use that term with a very large pinch of salt to describe myself), it’s something I’ve always enjoyed doing when I’m actually doing it and it brings a great feeling of satisfaction, something I’m craving these days. While raising my daughter will probably be one of my life’s greatest accomplishments, when you’re in the day to day of it (endless diaper changes, feedings, fussings, spit ups, sleepless nights, etc), it’s hard to see the big picture and fully appreciate what you’re creating and growing. And while I feel tremendous gratitude and joy spending my days with Emma, I need something to focus on for myself outside of (but just beside) motherhood. I’m starting to realize just how important it is to carve time out for yourself as a mother. As they say, you can’t pour from an empty cup. As I settle into a bit more of a routine with Emma, I’m starting to find ways to carve that time out. In fact, we’re in the middle of sleep training right now (so far pretty good, fingers crossed!) and I have a couple hours back to myself in the evenings. (Fact: It’s 8:30pm right now, Emma went to bed half an hour ago and I’m sitting by myself in bed typing this post - bliss!)
Back to my love of blogging. Unlike Instagram (or even TikTok, though I don’t use it), blogging feels like a safer place to be more vulnerable and authentic. In this day of short form content, it feels refreshing to consume (and in this case, create) long form content. Of course, it’s always a bonus to “own” your content, as with a website and unlike social media apps. And with what’s going on with the social media landscape right now, it feels even more important to have this space I own. Like most people I would assume, I have a love/hate relationship with apps like Instagram. Its highly curated, highlight reel nature lends well to comparison, which truly is “the thief of joy”. Don’t get me wrong, I love a good scroll and find much inspiration over there, but I often worry if I’m just contributing to the perfect narrative that is robbing us of enjoying our own perfectly imperfect lives. And that’s what I love about reading and writing blog posts (and Substacks!) There’s more space to get into the nitty gritty, to flesh out the tiny sliver of our lives we share on Instagram. That being said, I certainly am here to talk about and cultivate the “aesthetic” moments in life. I just want to serve along side it a deeper look into what I’m truly thinking and feeling - the more vulnerable and personal stuff.
As I dip my toes back into this space, I’m trying not to put too much pressure on myself. I’ve always struggled with perfectionism and it’s the reason I’ve never been able to be consistent over here. I also have a 5 month old who is a very demanding (albeit darling) boss. We’ll see how it goes.
So with all that said, hello again little corner of the internet. I hope I stay awhile, and I hope you do too.
